Author: Darren Barkhouse

Stirring the Pot, Literally…

In my house, I spend a lot of time in the kitchen, and that’s not just because I’m an East Coaster, but the fact that I love to cook.  A certain little preschooler in my house also has taken a liking to lending his hands in the kitchen as well, and it’s proving to be a fruitful experience.

Many families today rush through meal times during the organized chaos of their daily lives and often lean towards efficiencies rather than traditions, with technology strongly influencing this. But we can make time to cook, even if it’s something simple that takes 5-10 minutes or a full on meal, there are so many developmental areas for your child.

My son is a big fan of pancakes, homemade pancakes that is, and don’t try to fool him with fake maple syrup either.  We make them in about 10 minutes from start to plate, a few simple and memorized ingredients, mix it up and put it in the pan.  Sounds super simple yes, and it really is, but to a developing child’s brain this is a monumental task.  How many eggs? One or two cups of flour? How much is a tablespoon? And the questions continue.  Fine motor in the egg cracking and stirring, and special awareness around the hot stove are just a few of the benefits that come to mind.

So why don’t we see this happening like we use to? Ready-made dinners and take out menus have flooded the market and in the name of saving time.  Even when there is a home cooked meal prepared, parents often don’t include their children in the process as it takes longer to make with their help, or doesn’t turn out the same (I actually like lumpy mashed potatoes!), depriving them of an opportunity to grow.

Has my son burned himself on the stove or a pan, not really, just touched it long enough to know it commands his respect.  Have we made an incredible mess of flour and melted butter that took longer to clean up then to make the actual cookies, absolutely! Has my son’s literacy and numeracy prospered, 100%.  Cook with your kids, make a mess, make some memories.

Spring Has Sprung

Here in Southwestern Ontario, spring is seemingly here after a weirdly cold April, nonetheless, we’re seeing people outside more and more, especially cleaning up their yards after winter.  Enter amazing learning opportunity for a young child!

I’m clearly a fan of being outside, and getting back into the annual yard maintenance routine is something I actually look forward to, now too, does my 3 year old son.  Recently we set out to clear up all the dandelions, and patch up the lawn with some seed and soil where needed.

We set out with our tools of the trade, including his own little wheel barrow of course to collect all the weeds.  He was identifying specific things, using fine motor skills to pluck out the weeds (not exactly down to the root but nobody is perfect right?), he was sorting in his wheel barrow, counting as he went.  Next came the seeds, and based on the amount he spread initially, we’re looking at a lot of new grass!  Being as careful as he could with some coaching from dad, he eventually got the hang of spreading the right amount by hand.  Lastly came a little bit of soil to top things off, using my old tree planting spade (perfect size for a 3 year old!) he would scoop some dirt and spread it where the low patches and seeds were.  Again using skills listed above, also identifying different patterns in the grass, and continuing a positive conversation between us for the duration.

This whole activity took us about an hour or so as my lawn is not that big, but I could have done this all by myself in about 15-20 max.  By allowing our children to participate these activities, we help them achieve more than just the skills already mentioned, but also one specific one being delayed gratification.  Children and adults today have almost instant access to pretty much anything, and something as simple as taking care of some grass seed until it starts to grow can have more impact on a child than most know.

Get outside, you’re not only planting seeds in the ground, but planting amazing seeds of development in a young child’s fascinating brain.

Child Care : Home vs Centre?

I often get asked by educators, students and parents, which child care avenue is better for a child’s development – The ministry mandated larger scaled centres, or the small scaled home based, where some (wait for it) are NOT regulated.

I’ll start out by confidently saying that I promote a variety of child care options for children, including the two currently in debate. I’ve observed amazing child care centres, and some resembling jazzed up institutions.  I’ve observed incredibly inviting home care settings, and other homes that left me scratching my head in wonder that the walls were still upright.

Basing our assessment on physical space is a significant factor in the selection process yes, but in my opinion, it’s the educator that holds the most significant piece to the puzzle.  You could be in a centre or home care setting that may not look the most inviting, but has amazing educators.  Likewise you could be in the fanciest best laid out space ever seen, but the educators are subpar.

A good educator can introduce loose parts and creative invitations to a limited space, a good educator creates an environment of positive learning regardless of the space they inhabit, and a good educator caters to the specific needs of each child in their care.  The hard part is getting to know an educator in a relatively short period time before your child starts down whichever child care path.

Do your homework, ask strategic questions, and try and see for yourself before you pass judgement on one or the other.  For the record my 3 year old son currently goes to a home daycare with 3 other children, and he is always learning new things!  But so long as he’s around other children with a positive educator, the walls that surround him don’t matter so much to me.

Screens, The Good, The Bad, The Ugly

In the screen heavy, efficiency driven society we live in, we are quick to point fingers at something that hasn’t shown its full potential yet. Educators and professionals in the field agree that children and adults are exposed to more screen time today than ever before, but are we being too hard on technology, especially screens? Don’t get me wrong, I’m a HUGE advocate of reduced screen time for everyone, especially young developing children, but perhaps we are being a little naïve and forgetful that we too as children still watched TV, and participated in mindless and minimally beneficial activities too.

When children are constantly exposed to screens, especially screens being used simultaneously, for example, a TV on in the background with a tablet or phone in their hand, research is clear it’s having negative effects on children’s developing brains and bodies. I 100% agree, but do we sometimes jump to conclusions too quickly? When children are regulated with their screen time each day it can have positive effects on their learning. Hey, we all turned out ok watching ‘Bugs Bunny and Astro Boy’ after school right? When children need to be pried away from video games and tablets, using bribery and other tactics, now we’re dealing with an addiction issue.

I am by no means a perfect parent, and my three-year-old son watches TV shows and movies, but I am increasingly careful about having multiple screens on, especially in the background. When we hear ALL screen time is bad, I tend to push back on that. Hear me out – My son is obsessed with Thomas and Friends and I’ve observed him watching the show. He watches for about 30 minutes very intently, and after, goes down to the basement and builds his tracks for hours, attempting to replicate what he just watched, using the same characters, creating dialogue with the characters and even attempting a British accent! He may have been oblivious to his surroundings for the 30 minutes he watched the show on TV, but used what he saw and heard and created his own spin on things. His supply of trains does not represent the entirety of “The Island of Sodor” (we would be broke…) but he’s able to pull in other loose parts and materials to fill in those gaps, using his creativity and imagination.

When used constructively, screens can benefit children, and making a conscious effort to regulate it will make a difference in your child’s development. I’ll take my sons 30 minutes of screen time, and raise you 2 hours of creative and expressive play.

 

Confident & Capable Children

My three-year-old son and I recently took a walk down our cookie cutter street to the cookie cutter park that he enjoys playing at. Upon arriving, we noticed five girls, roughly aged 10-13, playing all over the outside of the play equipment. I have seen firsthand lots of neighborhood parents disapprove of such reckless play, and either attempt to stop it, or not let their children engage, but I saw opportunity written all over it.

As my son approached, he abandoned his usual routine of heading right for the slide, and he stood and watched for several minutes. While he was watching them, I too was observing and learning the rules of the game they played. Unfamiliar to me at the time, they were playing grounders; one person is ‘it’ with their eyes closed and if you happen to be touching the ground when they say “Grounders”, you become ‘it’. As I watched them play I also watched my son follow their movements and study them, and then he set forth.

The girls were mindful and respectful of him and his space, often giving away their position in the game to help him. He started up the slides, climbing things he had never tried, attempting to mimic the girls. He proved successful on some and bailed out on a few others, while I took all this in from an arm’s length (and for me that’s a generous arm) not intervening unless he asked for help. A small boost here, or a hand hold there, he was challenging himself and learning crucial developmental skills.

One of my philosophies is ‘never put a child in a tree’. Sounds odd coming from someone that loves nature and being outside, however if you place a child in a tree, you deprive them of the opportunity to learn. If they can’t get up the tree, they also can’t get down. Instead, provide them will opportunities to be creative and find solutions to help them reach that goal. Parents and educators can be quick to prevent children from having these positive exchanges with risky play. Strange having positive and risk in the same sentence? Children need to be seen as more confident and capable then most adults give them credit for, and we need to let them climb and explore so they know what it feels like to fall -hopefully not too far down though.

Even in our cookie cutter parks, children can be creative and take positive risks – we can’t just give them a little rope to go out on, they need the whole thing to reach their desired height. Let them climb. Let them fall. Let them grow.